The Only True Political Asylum...Punkers Haven

I've never drank because of a girl before but I have been drinking since about noon today and haven't really stopped being at least buzzed all day... why is it that girls feel the need to shit on nice guys. Do I just wear a sign saying that all girls should hate me because I'm going to treat them like they should be treated? Am I ever going to find someone who actually likes me for who I am... probably not... I'm pretty sure I should just give up entirly.

Oh god I don't feel well, my stomach is real queasy and my face is really warm. My mind has been in a state of constant depression for the past week or so. And I can't for the life of me get this girl out of my head. I want to go to bed right now but I have homework that I still have to do that I couldn't get done this weekend because we had our stag drunk party out in the woods on friday, BOTY formal on saturday, and bosch on sunday (which I should have skipped to do homework.) then earlier today we had senior meeting and I couldn't skip that either so I didn't get started on any of my weekends homework until midnight and I finally finished a "quiz" at 2:30, joked around with Drew for about fifteen minutes and now I'm procrastinating in order to hopefully have some working semblance of a mind, which isn't turning out so great. FUCK! I just want this week to be over. I want it to be thursday so that I can relax before I have to study for my one final on Wednesday and then drive home where I get to see all of my friends from downstate and be happy hopefully.

I've been so retarded lately, I forgot how to spell remember earlier. I just want to be fixed somebody must know how?

So my phones broken, we need not go into details other than it shorted out. So if anybody is trying to call me don't expect to get me. I'm looking into getting a new one but I need to know if what happened is covered by a warrenty. God it sucks not having a phone.

This is a story I wrote for a class. I was wondering what there is I can do to improve upon it. I want to eventually turn this into a short film. I want to fix up the end mostly, I rushed it to finish it for my class and I am very unhappy with it.

Quote/Ransom Thought of the Day: "Dude guess what, I had a thought today... or at least it would have been a thought if I knew French." - me
"Le Tour Ephant" - The thought that made me say that.

What's the secret? How can anybody be sure about anything? How can people fall in love when it's impossible to trust anybody? Nobody knows if another person is telling the truth, so how is it that so many people are able to just trust another person. Is it something you feel? I just don't know, I'm so fucking confused right now.

I bet you all missed these. Here is the Quote/Ransom Thought of the day.

"I once shat a lepruchan... he was green and squishy."

Stay tuned for more time wasting ransom thoughts.

WHAT THE FUCK!!!! I am pissed off that Florida beat out UofM for the national championship! It's fucking bullshit they are just handing the title to Ohio! No offense to Florida but they have really been playing shitty lately. Michigan only lost to OSU by three motherfucking points! Uof-fucking-M should be heading to Glendale and not the fucking Gators! FUCKING BULLSHIT!!! Well go Blue beat the Trojans I guess...

Does it bother anyone else that our generation is known as Generation Why? or the iGeneration? What have we done for ourselves? What is the great impact that our generation will leave on American culture? iPods? Myspace? Are these really the things that will define our generation? It makes me want to cry that this is where our generation is headed... Also is the whole Generation Why?, or the Cynical Generation as we are also known, going to affect this next generation which is becoming to be known as the New Silent Generation. The original Silent Generation would most likely be your grandparents (1925-1945) and were known for being unattached, unimaginative, and withdrawn. They were the children of the Lost Generation, who were born durring World War I and had no real sense of self. This New Silent Generation is born in the same sort of enviornment with parents from Generation X who, like the lost generation, didn't care about a whole lot. People blame 9/11 and the war in Iraq for the creation of the New Silent Generation but I blame Generation Why? We are the generation before them and will most likely be parents of some of these children born in this new generation (it is predicted to go up until 2014), we are their role models. We are their uninformed, unambitious, "who gives a rats ass" role models... and frankly I fear for the future of this world.

F YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie

Opening Credits: Theme Song - The Aquabats

Waking Up: Walk Idiot, Walk - The Hives

First Day At School: Pretty Girl (The Way) - Sugarcult

Falling In Love: Last Breath - Mad Caddies

Fight Song: No Brain - MxPx

Breaking Up: Bad Touch - Bloodhound Gang

Prom: A Passage in Time - Authority Zero

Life's Ok: Dumb - Nirvana

Mental Breakdown: Points of Authority - Linkin Park

Driving: IRo-bot - Coheed and Cambria

Flashback: Suburban Myth - Less Than Jake

Getting Back Together: World War III - Bad Religion

Birth of Child: Boris the Spider - The Who

Wedding: Life in Tenement Square - Flogging Molly

Final Battle: Blood on the Ground - Incubus

Death Scene: Burried Alive - Dropkick Murphys

Funeral Song: Race Against Myself - The Offspring

End Credits: Megalomaniac - Incubus

So I've decided after this past weekend that I am so glad to have you three as my closest friends. If there were ever a time in my life (since I have met you that is) that I somehow lose touch with you guys I'd be devistated. Anyway what I need to know is would we be able to make a pact now that every year no matter what from now until the end of our days we will always get together over New Years, Fourth of July, and some weekend in Summer? It really means a lot to me when I throw parties and I know that I can always count on the three of you to come, and I don't want that to ever change in the future like once we are all married and have another life. We're getting older, though we may not act the part, and pretty soon this is something that we may have to worry about... so obviously I'm starting a couple years ahead of schedule. I just want to be able to put these sort of fears to bed and know that we will always be as close to one another as we are now, boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife/work/kids be damned. I love you three from so deep in the bottom of my heart it's almost at my big toe (I gots a big heart like that). If we do make a pact we have to keep it; this means you move out of Michigan too bad you're coming back three times a year every year. Our friendship really means the world to me, it's what keeps me sane... I hope you all feel the same way too.

April 5th, 2006
6:05 PM

I am a nobody, I am the lowly scum that wouldn’t even stick on your shoe if you stepped in me. I am a self-loathing, self-mutilating, heartless son-of-a-bitch; and this is a story all about me.
For the twenty-three years that have passed since my birth I have wanted to be famous. Not famous in the way DaVinci or Vango or people who start bands and then four years later nobody can even recognize their music are famous, but I want to be famous like Elvis or Plato. But mainly I want to be famous like Jesus Christ was. I don’t want to be famous only after I die or only while I’m alive; I want everlasting fame. I want to be the Twenty-First century savior of mankind, there will be novels written about me, not just this shitty little journal.
When I was younger everybody said I would amount to nothing and I always told them they were wrong and just to wait and see. I suppose it would have been the same for Jesus; I mean who would believe you if you said you were the son of God? But that never stopped him now did it? I mean look how many followers he had… has, I don’t think you could have gone anywhere in the Middle East/North Africa region where people didn’t know who he was. Love him or loath him they knew who he was.
April 14th, 1996 was the day that I realized the truth. On that day when I was 13 I saw the sky open up revealing a great foreboding darkness. I kept thinking that I should feel terrified, but instead I was filled with a sense of joy that could only be known to a newborn baby, or that crazy guy down the street that’s always laughing after he hasn’t taken his medication in over two weeks. In that void I saw everything that was good and true, nothingness is the only answer. On that day I realized that the only way to save man kind was to end it.

I realize now why I have such a problem making new friends any more. Small talk... I fucking hate it, it's so fake. I mean when I'm just talking to one of my friends I actually want to know how they are doing. But with random people at a party you know... I just don't give a shit. I don't care for the fake how are you bullshit that you have to go through. It doesn't help either that my favorite topics to talk about are religion and politics which aren't polite to speak of with random people because "you don't know who you are going to offend." What's with this PC bullshit? Fuck this all, I want to meet new people but I don't want to go through all of the bullshit small talk, any suggestions?

I am not kidding they are making the cult classic 1981 Sam Raimi film into a Broadway Musical. If you don't believe me check this out

http://www.broadwayworld.com/viewcolumn.cfm?colid=10996

I have to admit... I'm a bit currious.

For those of you who don't know I am having my annual Fourth of July party on July second as that is when the fireworks on my lake are. If you are reading this you are invited. It starts at noon on sunday and ends whenever you feel like going home or I have to kick you out (which most likely won't happen.) If you are able to come call me or leave a message... hopefully it wont rain as the make up date is the 8th and I will not be home. Thus if it does rain we will still have a party it just wont be at my beach.

By the by if you don't know the procedure here it is, bring a bathing suit and towel, be prepared to swim out to my raft with said bathing suit on your person and said towel in hand above your head.. not in the water. If you could bring some sort of food that would be much appriciated, if not please bring money so that we may buy some sort of food stuffs.

So I was having a conversation with some people and we were talking about whether or not suicide was the coward’s way out of life. While I agreed with them that suicide is selfish and that it takes a strong person to persevere through life, I can’t see suicide as being cowardly. It has to take a lot of guts to give up on life… to know what you are going to leave behind; not just your family and friends and memories and all of that shit. But I mean the pain that you are going to leave behind for all of these people. Also I mean there is a lot of planning that has to go into suicide. It has to be something that you have thought out, spur of the moment suicides are rare and for somebody to think out how they are going to end their own life, for somebody to know that they are going to cut their lives short and no longer exist… it takes courage I think. Is it strange that I think it takes a stronger person to commit suicide than it does to stay alive? I mean staying alive is easy… but killing yourself seems like the hardest thing a person could ever do.

Don’t worry I’m not going to commit suicide, I’m just depressed right now and I don’t really know why.

Through Early morning fog I see
Visions of the things to be
The pains that are withheld for me
I realize and I can see

That Suicide is Painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
So this is all I have to say

Suicide is Painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The only way to win is cheat
And lay it down before I'm beat
And to another give a seat
For that's the only painless feat

Suicide is Painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works it's way on in
The pain grows stronger watch it grin

Suicide is Painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

A brave man once requested me
To answer questions that are key
Is it to be or not to be
And I replied "Oh why ask me."

Suicide is Painless
It brings on many changes
And I can take or leave it if I please

And you can do the same thing if you please

Does any one else feel like they missed out on life because of when they were born?

PARTY AT MY HOUSE ON THE BEACH!!! WILL LAST ALL DAY LONG (well from like noon until 2 am). BRING A BATHING SUIT, TOWEL, AND GOOD ATTITUDE!!! I HAD BETTER SEE A LOT OF PEOPLE SHOW UP!!